Had an incredibly busy week..
It felt good to have my mind fully occupied
It didn't feel so good to be constantly on edge dreading potential job errors
Needless to say,my funky ''peppers'' kept me going from morning to night each day
Listening to their songs really makes me feel super good inside..
Well..
I had a good job offer from the GM of the place I was helping out at.
I listened carefully..and I knew that it would have been so sensible to just grab the offer happily yet..something was stopping me.
I just felt that..looking around me..at the tired & angry faces..staring blankly at the millions of cargo details & invoices..this was not the place for me..
So I told him..in a very indirect polite way that I had other plans & thanked him for taking the time off his busy schedule to talk to me..
He seemed a little taken aback but told me that he could tell,based on our chat,that I was someone who woule be able to shine in the hospitality/tourism industry.
I was surprised..coz this was exactly what I had been pondering over myself for the past few months.
Needless to say my family weren't too happy with the way I had handled that situation,but frankly I don't give a damn..c'mon it's my life & I want to do something with it..not just get stuck on the wall forever.
So I made a couple of new friends,learnt alot of interesting stuff about the shipping line & best of all completed the whole stint without any trouble!!hahaha..
So on my final day,which was yesterday,I was pretty much relaxed.Mary came back from a short trip to M'sia & we decided to meet up after work for dinner..she waited for me at Tg Pagar MRT & we took a train down to Yishun..where Koko also planned to join us..
Went for dinner..I just had a burger & ice water..DIET remember?
In fact even the burger was a big no-no but what the hell..
Then I just craved for the Hershey's pie so Mary got me one of those..
I felt guilty but hey..it had been ages ok..
By the time Koko joined us we were done eating..and we moved on to out familiar coffeeshop haunt at Blk 925..we caught up on gossip & laughed like crazy asses..before finally making our way home..
It was close to 11pm by the time I got home..and I really felt tired..as I had been the past few days..I guess its the long walk to & fro in Tg Pagar..really gave my legs a good workout!!
Another thing is..
After a long time..I feel inspired.
As in really,realllly inspired.
As I was telling Glash earlier..
we all think about stuff when we listen to our favourite songs..
Most of the time..its about people close to our hearts..
Memories..that can bring out a smile..
Memories..that can draw out a tear..
Somehow..as I have been mentioning of late..
I find myself strangely drawn to Frusciante
Enjoyed it at first..thinking that this was just gonna be another passing cloud for me
True the band itself had been a long time favourite..
yet these past few weeks..
I have been addicted to his solo songs..
I don't know how to put it..
I guess its just best described as..inspiration
I don't know..why..but I find so much beauty in that man
Maybe its coz of his past?
I don't know!
The pure simplicity of the man VS his complex music?
I don't know!
All I know is that when I listen to John Frusciante,I forget about my broken heart,I forget about feeling lonely,I forget about anger,hate,pain..everything..all I feel is this sudden awareness of MYSELF.
It's a very beautiful feeling..it's like all my feelings get gently wrapped up in a light shimmery pearly satin soft cloth and I just wanna hug myself & forget everything..just wanna wrap myself up in that soft cocoon of lightness..so surreal..so magical..so everything I ever really wanted...
I don't expect people to understand what I'm talking about..
If you don't get it..really ..it's not my loss..
Well..I'm gonna talk to Glash for a while then hit the sack..
Where I know I'll be dreaming even before I fall asleep..
Listening to Ramparts..or Falling..or maybe Strip My Mind.
Music.
Love may betray me,music never will.
This is me,Patricia